Thursday, April 16, 2009

Am I making a huge mistake?

I am doing these Clinical's for massage therapy school where I do 30 hours of massages on people that my teacher sets up for me, later on I can do friends and maybe even family, but in the beginning she wants me to do some of her clients.

So far I did Laura, the other therapist that works with us, and her husband David on Tuesday night. Her husband loved it, he said I used the right amount of pressure and everything, but Laura said that she felt like I was awkward and that I didn't put any emotion or heart into the massage. She said I had great hands but she wondered if I should be doing massage therapy for a living. 

She has been doing massage for like 12 years so she noticed a bunch of things. She said i didn't have any flow and feeling, and like I said before, that I was awkward with the movements. She also said I didn't have enough strength yet and that I had no pressure. I think I did really well, but later in the massage I was distracted because my teacher came in and was talking to us and Laura was moving a lot and talking to Jessica and I just lost track of what I was doing completely. 

She thinks I'll get better with practice, which I will I'm sure, but it was still hard to hear since Jessica says I am doing really well and that I give a great massage. I'm wondering now if I should just get my certification in June and then just do it on friends and family instead of making it a career. I can probably go back to college to get a business degree or something from Macomb or maybe go into IT or something and then just do that. I don't want to make the mistake of doing this for a living if I'm no good at it. It made me really sad for the rest of the night. Le Sigh. Now I just don't know what to think but my confidence in my ability and passion to help people feel better is all but disappeared...

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